Oh no. Oh boy. Oh dear.
Every weekend golfer knows the feeling — when, for whatever reason (and maybe as many as 100 reasons), your swing is just gone, something’s off, and it’s probably going to be a long day.
That happened to me just as I was stepping into the arena against a 667-yard par 5. Carnage ensued.
Hi, welcome back, I’m Ryan. Last year, I took on The Monster 16th hole on the South Course at Firestone Country Club as a 22 handicap. It wasn’t pretty, but it was a fun experience, as I have very little ego when it comes to my golf game, and the course is pristine. The 2025 Kaulig Companies Championship will be held there later in June, with the final round falling on June 22.
This year I returned to Firestone South as a 21 handicap (slight improvement!) determined to, this time, slay the dragon — in this case, one of the longest holes on any Tour, and we’d be playing from the championship tips, just like the pros do.
Except I apparently forgot to sharpen my sword for the battle. Hitting the range before the round revealed some worrying signs that popped up out of nowhere. Many golfers will instantly recognize the feeling of helplessness. It’s one of those instances where, hey, maybe we don’t need to keep score today. I was almost chuckling walking to the first tee, knowing what was to come.
We teed off from No. 10, and as a 21-handicapper also not owning a workable swing even for my own relatively low standards, Firestone South tore me to pieces for the first six holes we played leading into The Monster 16th. Last year I played very well (for me), even breaking 100 on the South Course, which was a pretty big personal achievement. I birdied 15 a year ago, so my chest was probably puffed out a bit walking to No. 16, feeling good.
This year as I walked to The Monster’s tee? Oh no. Oh boy. Oh dear.
The Monster: No. 16 at Firestone South
The 16th at Firestone is a behemoth from any set of tees. Walking back to the championship tips is almost comical. The view just to clear the tee boxes requires binoculars and aircraft reconnaissance — thankfully the blimps were hovering above Akron to guide us.
As a not-great golfer having a very bad swing-day, the spot I was standing was probably one of the least ideal in the world. But here we go. No turning back now.
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Beacon Journal writer Ryan Lewis plays The Monster No. 16 at Firestone South.
Shot 1: Driver, 667 yards to go
Oh, I got lucky. For really the first time all day, I put a good swing on the ball with the driver. I was exhaling relief by the time the club head reached the top of my swing. I sent it about as far as I can down the left side.
Except, the realities of The Monster set in. Even with my best-case scenario drive, I didn’t technically get to the main fairway. I cleared the ridge, but the ball settled just by the side of the beginning of the fairway. Oof. Our trek continues from base camp.
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Beacon Journal writer Ryan Lewis plays The Monster No. 16 at Firestone South.
Shot 2: 3-Hybrid, 421 yards to go
Oh, dear reader, if you thought the good fortune would continue, I have bad news for you. As someone who grew up first playing baseball over golf, I not only fight a wicked slice at times, I also have to fight my brain telling me to swing harder, thus shifting my weight back a bit, which leads to me trying to crush the ball over the fence. Except there is no fence and, whenever my weight goes back, bad things happen.
Bad things happened. I duffed a hybrid maybe 30 yards. I couldn’t stop myself from swinging too hard yet again. Last year I hit my second shot basically nowhere as well, except it landed in the sand. This year, I did the same thing, only this time it at least stayed in some level of grass — which I guess is a small win? Sure, we’ll take it. Onward.
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Beacon Journal writer Ryan Lewis plays The Monster No. 16 at Firestone South.
Shot 3: 3-Hybrid, 381 yards to go
More relief. I hit a pretty solid hybrid to cut off about 200 yards of treacherous terrain between where I was and the green. This got me at least to within striking distance. I wish I had done that the first time I tried to hit a hybrid, but we can’t turn back now.
At this point in the round, I luckily had my two best swings of the day on No. 16. Whew.
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Beacon Journal writer Ryan Lewis plays The Monster No. 16 at Firestone South.
Shot 4: 4-Hybrid, 189 yards to go
I’m standing just in front of a sand trap with 189 yards to go, but the shot is over water. You trudge 667 yards and then the green is protected by a hazard — brutal. And the ball is below my feet.
And herein lies one of the reasons why The Monster is so aptly named. It isn’t just the eye-popping distance of 667 yards, it’s the undulation and the road blocks along the way. The 16th isn’t a straight shot — it’s a winding, curving beast, like a serpent carved out of the Earth, twisting back and forth. It tests you in nearly every way one golf hole can, and the elevation changes add another layer to it all.
I have two choices: Just hit a nice, easy 9-iron (hopefully) into the fairway to set up the final approach, which could just be a short pitch, or freaking go for it, because legendary stories aren’t made by those who lay up, and we didn’t go through all this hellish trouble to hit the brakes now — even if it’s clearly ill advised.
Dear reader, I am nothing but an instrument for your entertainment. I knew laying up…
